How it Began
Looking back to the summer of 2022 and how my journey to becoming a Spiritual Director began…
In less than two short years I will be in the dreaded and exciting empty nest chapter of my life. I will have spent almost 28 years as a stay-at-home mom of four beautiful children. Yes, I’ve done plenty of other things these past 2+ decades but my primary role has always been mom. Launching a child is hard. I know what it’s like to come back home after dropping off a child at college. The house is quieter, there are less groceries, less laundry, less activity, less mess…just less. I’ve done it three times now and it hasn’t gotten easier. I don’t expect the last time will be any different and perhaps it will be the hardest of all. Don’t get me wrong, parenting absolutely does not stop when they move out but it does look very different. I will allow plenty of time to live fully into the grief that I know will come. I know that raising children is not my whole story. For many months I have been in deep prayer, contemplation, and conversation about what empty nesting might look like. Yesterday I began preparation for that next chapter. I am so excited to start the three-year Certification of Spiritual Direction program at Perkins School of Theology at SMU. This actually feels like the exact right next thing for me. I’ve got some life experiences that I think make me uniquely qualified for this work and I cannot wait to see how God uses my experiences and what I learn over the next three years in this new role. I have absolutely no idea what it is going to look like and I am absolutely okay with that.
Since 2013, when I started Fastpacs, every single time God writes a hard and scary call into my story He promises me two very specific things. His presence and to send people. So to every single person who has written letters on my behalf, who has texted words of affirmation and encouragement, who has prayed with me and for me, thank you. You know who you are and I want you to know that I consider you a fulfillment of God’s promise. I am deeply grateful for you.
As this chapter concludes, I am overwhelmed with a profound sense of awe and gratitude. I am deeply thankful for all I have learned and the friendships I've cultivated. Over the past 18 months, during my supervised practicum, I have been transformed by those who have entrusted me with their challenging stories, insightful questions, and delicate hearts. It has been an immense honor and privilege, and I look forward to continuing this good work.
